I Miss You

In my heart there’s an apology
That will never cross my lips…
There’s a deep regret inside me
That I will never dare admit…
The haunting sense of loneliness
That I so casually dismissed…
An emptiness creeping over me
A reminder of something I missed…

I could throw away my arrogance
And beg for your return…
For friendship. For love. For anything…
On your conditions, your time, your terms…
Yet perhaps imploring your forgiveness
Is too much for my pride to bear…
After all you gave me up without hesitation,
No pause, no thought, no care…

I wanted your hand in mine
And you wanted a distance apart
So I threw away a friendship
Over a shattered bleeding heart…
I wanted to regret it
But your decision helped me see
That it’s impossible to pass regret upon
What could never be…

So saddened though I am
For what I cast aside
I will not wallow in regret
Nor be taunted by my pride.
I miss you, I miss you so much
And I’m not ashamed that I do.
I jumped before I had a look
Yet I’d do it again for you…

I just hope that someday,
If ever again we meet
The smiles that pass between us
Won’t be of bitterness or deceit…
Smile rather because you remember
There was something special we once shared
And brief as it was it got me,
And for that, neither of us were prepared.